Monday, November 9, 2009

the future is now, or at least it could be

is it possible to skip all the work that goes into various school projects and go straight to winter break? I have one report that I suspect is due tomorrow (and I can't check that at the moment, as the elderly machine I'm currently using is having issues with Adobe Reader) and my problem-solving class group also wants to meet tonight so we can go over our findings so far. We spent a month surveying trees. I mean, it's all for the good of the community we're helping and developing our scientific skills, but I am *so* glad that is done.

I have senioritis, and it seems like it's about time. Normally I love college, and would like to stay and study all kinds of different subjects if I could. But lately I've been feeling that if only I could get a decent-paying job and work for a while, then I could have money for a car and a bigger apartment and all kinds of other things. Hell, I'd have a car! That in itself opens up all kinds of possibilities (I'm infected with wanderlust and it's frusterating to settle with daydreams)--everything from a weekend road trip to being able to go to the grocery store and really stock up on food whenever I want. Whenever I have the time, I could go forth and do!
The fact that I either bus, walk, or occasionally carpool everywhere does give me a bit of green pride (in that I'm using transportation options that emit less greenhouse gases and use less fossil fuels) but I think I'm just getting selfish or something; I want to move on. I want to be more independent: get a house with a big lot, get a good job I can plug away at for a while (if only to get a better job later on) and feel like I'm doing more than just preparing for the future. I'm an adult, dammit, and I want to act like one.
I feel like someday is getting closer and closer: someday I'll have kids and a big dog and a house with enough yard for some huge gardens and I'll make homemade meals all the time and I'll have a well-paying, meaningful job...

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